Marissa Barnartt doesn鈥檛 have to travel far to see her mother on Family Day on Monday. All she needs to do is open her bedroom door.
In late 2019, the 34-year-old financial advisor moved back in with her mother in north Toronto after giving up her apartment because of an issue with her landlord.
But the shared living arrangement turned out to be 鈥渁 blessing in disguise,鈥� says Barnartt. The COVID-19 pandemic has extended her stay for more than a year now, bringing mother and daughter closer together than ever.
After losing her father about a decade ago, Barnartt says the crisis has given her the chance to reconnect with the woman who raised her 鈥� this time as roommates. And while she wouldn鈥檛 mind a bit more space, there鈥檚 no one else she鈥檇 rather shelter-in-place with.
鈥淥ur lives were always very busy between school, work, extracurriculars,鈥� she said. 鈥淚t is nice knowing that we have that quality time now that we didn鈥檛 necessarily have with my dad鈥� Even if it鈥檚 too much sometimes.鈥�
While pandemic-related restrictions have separated many families, some Canadians are reuniting with relatives to support each other through the crisis, often rekindling bonds that had perhaps been neglected in the bustle of pre-lockdown life.
The Barnartts said they鈥檝e not only had to relearn how to live together, but have discovered new ways they can rely on each other.
Barbara Barnartt said she鈥檚 happy to spare her daughter the cost of rent in return for some help with a home renovation.
鈥淪he鈥檚 got somebody to talk to, and I鈥檝e got somebody to talk to,鈥� Barbara Barnartt said. 鈥淚t鈥檚 really helped us both.鈥�
Times of crisis tend to pull families together, often because of increased pressure to pool resources such as money and housing, said Barbara Mitchell, a professor of sociology and gerontology at Simon Fraser University in Vancouver.
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But the process of sorting into social bubbles has also forced people to think about the relationships that matter most to them, and more often than not, close family members tend to outrank the rest, Mitchell said.
鈥淔amilies are incredibly resilient,鈥� she said. 鈥淭hey have this capacity to weather storms and bounce back from adversity in ways that can actually make them stronger.鈥�
For Karen Avey, the pandemic presented the inadvertent 鈥済ift鈥� of being able to see how much her son has grown since moving to Shanghai five years ago to study traditional Chinese medicine.
Late one night last March, Avey heard a knock on the door of her home in Brantford, Ont., and was stunned to find her 24-year-old standing on her porch.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e going to be mad,鈥� he told her, explaining that he鈥檇 been quarantining at his father鈥檚 house for two weeks without telling her, because he knew nothing would stop her from trying to see him.
鈥淭hat was absolutely true,鈥� Avey said. 鈥淭hen we sat on the sofa, stuck together like glue.鈥�
After he left for school in 2016, Avey said her son had only been able to visit home a handful of times because of the rigours of his program. Now, he鈥檚 just a short drive away at his father鈥檚 house while working together at his medical clinic.
Avey said her son will only see her outside on the porch to reduce the risk of exposing her to the virus, but she still manages to sneak in the occasional hug as she marvels at the accomplished young man her boy has become.
鈥淚t鈥檚 a whole new level of pride in who he is, what he wants to do and what he鈥檚 doing now.鈥�
Melanie Billark said her grandmother was her 鈥渞ock鈥� growing up, so when the 82-year-old needed someone to take care of her, she didn鈥檛 hesitate to return the favour.
A few months into lockdown, Billark said her grandmother was hospitalized for a psychotic episode after she stopped taking medication for her dementia and Alzheimer鈥檚.
Since then, the 30-year-old artist has been travelling from Toronto to her grandmother鈥檚 long-term care home in Oakville to help her relearn routines and counsel her through her mental health struggles.
鈥淚f the roles were reversed, which they were before, she would have done anything for us,鈥� she said. 鈥淚 feel it鈥檚 my job now to help her.鈥�
Billark admitted that her new role as caretaker has been both 鈥渁 blessing and a curse.鈥� With every visit, she has to weigh the risks of infection against the psychological toll of social isolation.
鈥淚 have all of this responsibility on my shoulders,鈥� she said. 鈥淏ut it鈥檚 the benefit of her own mental health and stability and having contact with someone that it kind of outweighs everything for me.鈥�
While Allison Bradley in 麻豆精选, B.C., can鈥檛 see her parents on a regular basis, in some ways, she feels like she鈥檚 spending more time with them than ever.
Bradley said video chat has allowed her and the rest of her family to 鈥渧isit鈥� her 87-year-old mother and 90-year-old father every weekend, giving them a chance to see their first great grandchild grow up from afar.
She鈥檚 also taken the time to digitally reconnect with relatives across the globe, some of whom she hadn鈥檛 seen in years.
鈥淚 didn鈥檛 realize how much all these people meant to me,鈥� she said.
鈥淎ll of a sudden, we鈥檙e not so wrapped up in our own little worlds, and we鈥檙e remembering to reach out to the people that we care about.鈥�
Adina Bresge, The Canadian Press
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